How My 20s Prepared Me For My 30s Part 2

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Hi everyone, I am back with Part 2 of the blog, “How My 20’s Prepared Me for My 30’s”. Let’s not be naïve to think one’s mind will automatically change once it has hit a certain age. Instead, we must understand that our brain changes as we move throughout life. You should also take into consideration your environment and whether you are engaging in mentally and physically stimulating activities. According to some psychologists, your brain is fully developed after the age of 25. Your frontal lobes are centered in the front of your brain and are responsible for controlling your feelings, cognitive or reasoning thinking, and behavior. Therefore if your brain is not fully developed until about age 25-30, you may struggle with the pressure to fit in or to make a sound judgment about something. One noticeable behavior trait is impulsiveness. Meaning that you act without really thinking. As you age, you start to slow down and think things through thoroughly especially when it comes down to eating certain foods late at night lol. Furthermore, you feel less pressured to try and fit in and less sensitive to the influence of wanting to please everyone. You learn to embrace your weirdness and accept your flaws as you get older. Having the ability to think for yourself is awesome lol.  Anywho, I am aware that this is not a psychology class or lesson, but my point is that you have some great mental things to look forward to in your 30’s! lol. Next up, is Ms. Karissa. I met Karissa 5 years ago through a mutual friend, and our friendship grew from there. I volunteered for a grass-roots organization that she and our mutual friend founded together called The All for Love Foundation. We all became very good friends!

When Karissa and I met, she was also a Teacher Development Specialist, which is the person who sits in classrooms to observe and coach teachers. Since then, Karissa has stepped out on faith and launched her clothing company called A Leap of Style. Now, whenever I see her business being featured in the public eye, I am extremely happy because I know her dedication as well as the prayers that she put in behind closed doors. So it’s my pleasure to introduce ya’ll to my; crawfish eating, African print designer, sophisticated and cute friend…. Karissa!!!

karissa

 1. What’s your name?

Karissa 

 2. How old are you?

31

 3. What is your occupation or what is it that you like to do for fun? 

I’m an entrepreneur/fashion designer. 

 4. Are you enjoying your 30’s so far?

Yes, my 30’s so far have been fun. I’ve been feeling a lot more free to just be myself. 

 5. If you can think back, are your 30’s going the way you envisioned when you were in your 20’s?

Sort of. In my early 20’s I thought I’d be married by now and a little more wealthy lol. By my mid to late 20’s I understood that the marriage part would happen in God’s time and not my timetable. I am building my business, so I think I’ll hit the financial marks that I envisioned soon. 

 6. How is your 30’s different mentally and physically from your 20’s, if there is any change?

A friend of mine kept telling me my knees were going to start aching when I turned 30, but I refused to accept that! I do feel more in tune with my body and what it needs – like I notice when I’m dehydrated more often or when I need certain types of food or rest. Mentally, I just feel so much more secure. I still have insecurities, but they are fewer and I deal with them so much better. I’ve been through a lot in general, but now that I’m 30 I just see that life is too short to worry too much. 

 7. How do you think your 20’s prepared you for your 30’s? For example, you may have dealt with insecurity in your 20s but gained confidence in your 30’s due to many rejections or tests in your 20’s; you learned to love yourself and enjoy life in your 30’s. 

I think every season prepares you for the next. There were several tests in my 20’s with illnesses in my family and with starting my business that have made me more resilient in my 30’s. I’m not as easily panicked or swayed by issues anymore. I trust God more. I trust my decision making more.  I think I’m still learning to love myself and that’s a huge part of my early 30’s so far. I’m excited about this season

 8. Is there anything you would like to tell those who are scared or worried about their 30’s?

Your 30’s are amazing – there’s literally nothing to be scared of or worried about. The day I turned 30 I felt this freedom come over me, and I’d heard from other people that this would happen, so I looked forward to it. Look forward to growing wiser and to that freedom, and your anxieties will fade. 

Thank you Karissa and I pray God keep blessing you and your business as you remain faithful to Him!

 

It’s interesting to see how as people who, in their 20s once thought the same lol. In our 20’s, we are thrust out into the real world to figure out life and we all have this goal to obtain the “American Dream” but get disappointed or frustrated when our idea of the “American Dream” is rerouted to something else. The good thing is that God has the ultimate plan laid out for us and redirects us when we venture off. Meet Stephen; he’s a husband, father, and Pastor of Journey of Faith Church. We met through the same mutual friend that connected me and Karissa and he was kind enough to let me interview him for this blog. Let’s see what he has to say about his 30’s.

 SG

1. What’s your name?

Stephen Goldsmith 

 2. How old are you? 

37 

 3. What is your occupation or what is it that you like to do for fun?  

For the last 20 years I have worked as a professional musician, worship leader, and clinician.  I’ve spent the last twenty years doing what I love to do in the music industry, however I’ve recently been appointed as the Senior Pastor of Journey of Faith Church in Humble, TX, as of June 11, 2017.  (shameless plug I know)  Moreover, I have a deep passion for preaching and teaching.  For fun, I enjoy spending time with my wife and kids!  My kids tend to bring out the big kid in me!!!  

 4. Are you enjoying your 30’s so far?  

I have enjoyed my 30’s immensely.  My perspective on life has changed, and I don’t think that it’s something that would’ve happened in my 20’s.  Largely, because my obligations, responsibilities, and some goals have changed.  I don’t live solely for the moment anymore. These days, I live in the moment for the future!  

 5. If you can think back, are your 30’s going the way you envisioned when you were in your 20’s?  

My 30’s are going much better than I initially envisioned in my 20’s.  My whole drive as a twenty-something revolved around the thrust to become a major producer, and work for the largest artist in the industry; of which I’ve been blessed to accomplish.  I’ve had the opportunity to travel the world with everyone from Fred Hammond to Bishop Marvin Sapp.  But, my greatest joy has been pursuing my call to expand the Kingdom of God as a young man.  This has been the ultimate fulfillment; especially knowing that I have the opportunity to impact a culture where so many Millennials and even Gen Xer’s are turning away or on the brink of turning away from the church.  That said, as a 37 year old African American male I get to hold up the banner that says, God loves You and Me, and if you open your heart He has the power to transform it!!  

6. How is your 30’s different mentally and physically from your 20’s, if there is any change?  

Mentally, my approach to life and the tasks and responsibilities focuses on working smarter not harder.  As I mature in age, I give far less attention to events that cause me to waste time and energy.  Physically, I’ve rediscovered muscles that I forgot I had!  For example, I was jumping up and down with my kids a couple of days ago, and the next day I felt every bit of that play time!  (LOL)  Needless to say, it was well worth the pain!!  

7. How have your goals or career choices changed in your 30’s if at all?  

As previously stated, I’ve transitioned from musician to pastor, and the journey has been incredible.  I will graduate from Perkins School of Theology at Southern Methodist University (Dallas) on May 20, 2017, and I never imagined that I would have transitioned into a vocation as a clergy this way.  As a preacher’s kid, I always thought I would go home and serve my parents church as part of the succession plan.  In lieu, my journey into ministry has called me to pastor in the United Methodist Church in Humble, TX.  

8. How do you think your 20’s prepared you for your 30’s? For example, you may have dealt with insecurity in your 20’s but gained confidence in your 30’s due to many rejections or tests in your 20’s; you learned to love yourself and enjoy life in your 30’s.  

Great question!  I will say that my 20’s pushed me toward discovering who I really am in my 30’s.  For example, when it came to stepping out on my own in certain areas I struggled with the confidence to go on my own; or so I thought.  But, when I began to survey my life in the last 5 years I realized that I had more confidence than I realized in my 20’s.  Largely, because my perspective was narrow.  This is something we tend to do often as younger adults.  We minimize our successes over against our fears or insecurities.  

9. Is there anything you would like to tell those who are scared or worried about their 30’s? 

When I began to look at my life, I realized it took a lot of faith and confidence to leave Rockford, IL at 18 years old, and move to Chicago (the Big Windy City) to pursue a career as a professional musician.  It takes courage to step out of your comfort zone.  The question is will you step out, and throw caution to the wind of possibilities???!!!  I’m here to tell you that, “You can do it!!”  

 Thank you Pastor Stephen for your time. God bless!

 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. If you have any prayer request, suggestions, questions, or advice, please comment below or send me an email at cultivatedbylove@gmail.com. God Bless You!

 

 

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